At the Goodwill Store

"Oh Dahling it's simply divine,"

I heard it at the Goodwill store.

Across the way down the dress line,

"These bargains Sugar are to die for."

So highfalutin I had to peek

For most out of place such a tone,

Not what I'd call Goodwill speak,

More like snooty if it must be known.

And there they were these two old broads

Who didn't look all that wanting,

I mean nothing like us Goodwill sods

In their diamonds and pearls flaunting.

And so I watched them for a while,

Like two kids in a candy store,

These two old broads of wealth and style

Brimming at the bargains galore.

So contagious was their glee

That I thought hell if the shoe fits;

Now dahling I'm a wannabe

At Goodwill puttin' on the Ritz.